Love

Short little thing.

I am so madly in love, with someone I’ve known for years. We get along, we laugh and have fun, have tons in common, and basically have a fantastic time.

But because of having poor relationships in the past, and because of watching everyone around me have trouble in their relationships, I keep fretting over what will happen in the future. I keep trying to figure out what could happen that would break us up.

Every direction I look for where the problem might come from, I find more things I love him for, or things where I see a difference and go “yup, but I get along with this.” Maybe there will be an issue that arrises one day from me, but I can’t see myself exactly through his eyes.

I feel, at this point, like it is an issue in this day of the internet, that it is so easy to fall into the feeling like something always will come up to end a relationship, and I think that is the wrong way to look at the world.

 

Value

Money, time, property, treasures. Everything in this world has a value to us. A measure of how much one thing is worth to us compared to the others. Not all of those comparisons are ones that are socially acceptable to admit. “How much would you pay for the life of a stranger in a foreign country” for example. Others, are much closer to our hearts.

What we all understand, but few realize, is that the amount of money is irrelevant, particularly if your base necessities are met, especially in our world of credit cards. $200 for a ream of blank paper is silly. $200 for a college text book is over priced, but acceptable. $200 for a house is good fortune beyond reason.

But let us look beyond currency, and to what really matters to us; the relationships, romantic and not, that we have with other people.

We pay for relationships with our time, our love, our reactions and emotions. In every small deed and kindness, and all the rude jokes. With our energy, tears, laughter, and sleepless nights. Even for the relationships we do not want, the people we push away, we pay for it with our energy and anger, with our words and stern expressions. It is all worth something to us.

The question is, when is the price higher than the value?

When are you giving more to the person than they are worth to you, and when do you need them to remind you why you are putting as much in as you are. When is it time to loosen your hold, and find another place to spend your time, your smiles, your tears.

Sometimes, I think that place is when the other person can hear this, and decide you aren’t worth their effort, and aren’t worth convincing. When seeing you walk in is a feeling of burden, rather than a feeling of warmth.

Value is a difficult thing for us to judge. Particularly when society tells us that you cannot put a price on loved ones and friends, and that trying is wrong. But whatever we say, we are all measuring up worth of one thing, one person, to another.

And we all strive for the infinitely renewable sources in our lives. The ones that give back to us as much as they receive. That will pick us up as reliably as we will them when they need it. Whether you talk to them once a year or once a day, those friends are what I think many people need to feel whole, and warm. What we need to keep from being drained by our lives.

Ramblings of Love

Love is a fickle thing. It is as immediate and constant and forever, as it is slow and tidal and fleeting.

But what is “love” in it’s essence? According to my dictionary, it is;

An intense feeling of deep affection

A deep romantic or sexual attachment to someone

A great interest and pleasure in something

By definition, it seems to me that love is an emotion; and so something that can vary in intensity but that cannot “runout” or even be easily given square edges to define where it came from.

Love is an addiction; a feeling so strong it becomes a thing that many would rather die than lose once they have it in a potent enough fashion.

But here we come to a dilemma. Loving makes us feel good, and is good for us, as does being loved. It is something that we cling to, even when that love is no longer shared or best for the other. But I am also told that true love is selfless; and that truly loving something means being willing to give it up if it is best for that thing or person.

I suppose my question then is “Is the most intense love when you would rather die than lose the object of your affection, or when you can separate yourself from what you love enough to give it up when that is best for it?”

I believe that it is a combination.

The love that runs deep through your soul, until it is a part of you as much as your own blood, that is what I think is the most rich and lasting love, the “truest”. A love that you can give up when it will better that which you love, is one that is perhaps more selfless, but one that I think is weaker and more cowardly, and both the least and most respectful depending on the circumstances, but which is most often cowardly.

Finally, I think that love is a thing that is entirely separate than the thing which you love. Love is a thing which is inside of you or that is offered to you.

Love is not always constant, and that fact scares most people.

Love is also about ourselves. Few can love someone or something without it returning similar graces to them; because as much as we enjoy loving, we enjoy more being loved, accepted, trusted, adored. The trick is holding our own love fast while we wait out the low points to again feel another’s love.

Little Comments Like These

Sometimes it is the little comments that make me shudder to a halt in my tracks.

“Mom, what do I do if I find a body?”

“Chest compressions.”

We live in a world filled with death. In fact, a world built with that being the one real eventual certainty, yet one that we cannot truly grasp or come to terms with.

Death as a concept it hard enough. Death of a figure, or a stranger is easier to grasp, but no easier to settle. Our own death somehow becomes a thing we can know is coming, create religions about, and maybe fear, but it somehow is harder to make tangible. But death of someone we know, worse, death of someone that we have held close. That is beyond words. It rends the soul, tears the mind, and leaves us gasping.

Feeling someone being ripped away like that so many times. Coming to a place where nothing seems quite so permanent. Where no one feels like a keystone anymore.

It breaks my heart to see it.

To everyone out there who has lost someone they loved, *hug*

Body Weight Exercises

Keeping your body healthy is important, both in and of it’s self, and for your mental and emotional health. Each part of you will work better when the other parts are all doing their share. Exercising also tends to become more enjoyable the more often you do it, and the better shape that your body becomes.

Body weight exercises allow you to work your muscles more naturally than machines or weight lifting. They can also be done just about anywhere, and seem to give you a more well-rounded workout.

This table is one that I found a while ago, and have found to be very useful in figuring out where to start, and what sort of things you can do. It is also a lot of fun to try out new ones, and to see yourself slowly being able to work your way down the chart. You should all take a minute to try a few of these. Each picture links to a video demonstrating how to do the exercise.
Periodic Table of bodyweight exercises

Speed Jacks High Knee Running in Place Switch Kicks Ski Jumpers Frog Lunge Tuck Jumps Mountain Climbers Sky Kicks Quad Hop Switch Backs Crunches Flutter Kicks Bicycles Planks Hanging Kicks Sliding Plank Plank Reach Cross Planks Shoulder Bridge Side Plank Bear Hug Crunches Vertical Crunch Scorpions Body Rocks Ab Flex Side Raises Variation Scissor Kicks Spiderman Planks Mason Twists Plank Crawls Extended Planks Crunchy Frogs Circle Kicks Brock Shuffle Reverse Crunches Squats Wall Sits Jack Squats Twisting Squat Jumps Twisting Lunges Chair Poses Squat Jumps Reverse Leg Lifts Lunges Single Leg Deadlifts One Legged Triple Jumps Single Leg Squats Flamingo Squats Kick Your Butt Calf Raises Clock Lunges Scissor Squats Supermans Push Ups (On Your Knees) Push Ups Wide Arm Push Ups Push Ups with a Clap Jump Back Push Ups Chest Taps Dragon Walks Wide Arm Push Ups (On Your Knees) Chest Press Hindu Push Ups Jumping Jack Push Ups Wide Arm Push Ups (Twist Up) Strongman Flex Diamond Push Ups (On Your Knees) Tricep Dips Diamond Push Ups Pike Ups Pike Push Ups Shoulder Annialators Tricep Extension Push Ups Springing Tripods Single Leg Tuck Jump Burpees Knee Slap Push Ups Muay Thai Push Ups Aztec Push Ups Crucifex Push Ups One Arm One Leg Push Ups Superman Push Ups L Seats Frozen V Sits 360 Degree Push-Ups

Periodic Table of Exercise (original location)

Meditation

Meditation is a practice in which an individual trains the mind or induces a mode of consciousness, either to realize some benefit or as an end in itself.

The term meditation refers to a broad variety of practices (much like the term sports) that includes techniques designed to promote relaxation, build internal energy or life force (qikiprana, etc.) and develop compassion, love, patience, generosity and forgiveness. A particularly ambitious form of meditation aims at effortlessly sustained single-pointed concentration single-pointed analysis, meant to enable its practitioner to enjoy anindestructible sense of well-being while engaging in any life activity.

~Wikipedia

There are so many forms of meditation, I can’t even begin to address them all here. But, I would like to talk about some of the amazing (and powerful) things it can do, and a few of the methods that I have found and enjoyed. I’m also going to talk about some of the negative thoughts on meditation some people hold.

Your subconscious can sabotage you in major ways, from throwing a tantrum about the monkeys tearing apart the circuitry, to making you forget and lose things, to taking away your ability to walk. Meditation facilitates communication between the different parts of your mind, and allows you to deal with the monkeys and other problems that inevitably come throughout your life, and makes you a happier person, such as this monk. (I’m linking that one twice in this article because it is just that interesting.)

I am going to concentrate on what is done during meditation, rather than where the methods originated from. This is partially because I’m not sure where the came from exactly, and partially because I am more interested in the affects of meditation on the mind and body than I am in it’s history.

Why Does it Work

Meditation seems to allow the brain to communicate with itself more easily, and allows it to come to terms with and make decisions or chances more effectively. Essentially, most people are running around with 90% of their brain shouting about what is going on, with their conscious (the 10%) sitting in a sound-proofed cockpit going “What was that? Couldn’t hear you. Oh, by the way, we’re going this way now 😀 keep us from crashing, would you?” In that analogy, meditation is the conscious getting up for a minute, opening the door and saying, “Hey, so how is the plane going, and are there any problems or anything I should know about?”

This is really important. Especially considering that the rest of this “plane” includes everything from your medical health, to traumas you’ve suffered, to the angst you’re feeling about that ex girlfriend. It’s also very important because –as intelligent, big, and powerful as your subconscious is– it can throw tantrums like a 3-year old, and will sabotage you if you don’t listen to it for long enough.

A really common example of this sabotage is when your subconscious starts hiding things from you. In general, your subconscious remembers everything you see, hear, touch, or learn. It knows exactly where your keys are in the morning, where you left your glasses, that you were supposed to wake up at 6 (and knows when that is without an alarm), and that you were supposed to call her back. If your subconscious can’t see the point in reminding you, if it’s mad at you, if it is throwing a tantrum because you’re ignoring how helpful it’s been, or if it just really doesn’t want to do something: it will just make you forget and laugh at you while you try to figure it out.

After all, how helpful you would feel if you were in this situation? You run the plane, you keep it flying and make sure it doesn’t hit things or run our of fuel, and you make the steering wheel actually do something. But there are rabid monkeys running amok and half the plane is on fire, and you need the pilot to do something about it. Instead of listening or helping, the pilot turns the music up and starts singing along.

Meditation opens the lines of communication between the conscious and subconscious, allowing the you to hear about all the issues, calm the subconscious down, and make it feel appreciated. After all, it only controls everything from your memory to, to walking, to breathing, to your heartbeat, not to mention that it is the foundation of nearly all of your emotions.

I can’t find the article now, but there was a mormon boy who lost his ability to walk while on a mission trip. Nothing was wrong with his legs and no one was quite sure what wrong with him. Eventually he talked with a therapist, and it turned out that he had a few rather major problems with what he was preaching (if memory serves, issues with his parents and he was gay). Once he realized what his issue was and faced it, he was able to walk again. His subconscious couldn’t find anything else to get the kid’s attention, so it turned off his ability to walk. Things like this happen very regularly, especially in the job environment, religion, and occasionally in problematic relationships.

On the other hand, monks (who frequently meditate, and focus on becoming happier, more calm and loving people) are some of the most happy people on earth. I highly recommend you all go read this article. Buddhist Monk, Happiest Man On Earth

No one is really sure what meditation does scientifically, they are still studying it, and are making some very interesting discoveries. A little odd to think that it has been around for thousands of years, that many people make use of it every day, and scientists still aren’t quite sure what they’re doing. But perhaps that isn’t surprising, we still don’t “know” most of what our own brains do every day for us, and much of the human body is still a mystery even as we learn more every year.

I’m not going to summaries the article I just linked to, because I really want you all to read it, but essentially: even if scientists don’t know everything about what meditation does, they do know that it makes a measurable change to the brain, and makes people happier and healthier.

Negative Stereotypes

I’ve heard people assume that meditation was new-age BS, or something only for pagans. I’ve heard people be skeptical that meditation does anything, and I’ve heard saying that they thought it was somehow evil or of the devil. I’ve also heard people be afraid of meditation.

To begin with: YES, meditation does work if you put the time and effort into it, and there are many people who have had (frankly) amazing results with the things they were able to accomplish through it. People have kicked habits, improved their health, fought off illness, temporarily stopped their hearts, and have discovered a wide range of things about their own brains. This is all aside from the emotional benefits and self-happiness that it can help you achieve.

Second: Meditation has been around for thousands of years, and was in-fact part of christianity and many other religions for a very long time. I am not certain what led to the current separation between (at least most) versions of christianity and meditation, but meditation was once considered a form of prayer and a way to understand god. I suspect that the divide came about when eastern meditation was introduced. Since christians and meditation have been one of the larger sticking points I’ve found, I would encourage you all to check out this section of the Wikipedia article referenced at the beginning of this post.

 

Methods of Meditation

The main methods of meditation that I have experienced are mainly: Basics, Breathing Exercises / Visualizations, Study, House Mind, Exploratory, Focus / Subconscious Focus. The experiences here are mostly my own. I do not claim to be an expert on this, but I have been using various forms of meditation for 6+ years, and I dabbled in it before that.

Basics –

The closest thing to a “base” to meditation that I have found is simply calming and centering yourself. There isn’t a special way of sitting needed to meditate, and you don’t need to hum or repeat phrases endlessly. The closest thing to a core of meditation seems to be making yourself and mind still, and concentrating inward on yourself.

Early on, it is often very difficult for people to calm their mind, to stop thinking about the dishes that need to be done, how your nose itches and you really should get another cup of coffee and walk the dog. Or to keep from thinking about who might have just closed a door down the hall, and if the text your heard was the one you were waiting for. Because of this, it is helpful to start off in a quiet place where you won’t be disturbed, and at a time when you can turn your phone off. It can also be very difficult to focus on nothing and to keep your mind entirely blank, which is why it can be so useful to concentrate on your breathing. Breathing is very central to each of us, and it turns your thoughts away from the outside world, and back to what you are doing.

Calming yourself and turning your attention away from the outside world is something I’ve found to be a useful starting block for the other exercises.

Breathing Exercises / Visualizations –

This form of meditation seems to be very popular on the internet lately, and it is one of the easier methods in my experience. In it, you begin by focusing on your breathing, and then visualize various things moving through your body, around you, or in you. What the visualization is of changes the affect it will have on you. Most of these seem to have fairly mild effects in my opinion, but they can be very relaxing and can make you feel much better, and they can be relatively quick and useful tools. This form is one that I’ve heard referred to as mindfulness meditation

Study –

This is a method used quite a lot traditionally, and which I suspect would be very useful for all levels of education, though it isn’t one that I have personally explored much. This is a form of concentrative meditation. The idea behind this form is to read about whatever you wish to study, and then to meditate on what you have read. Essentially you spend some time being still and either thinking intensively about what you just learned, or focusing on one particular point or phrase you learned, to engrain it in your mind and to gain a better understanding of the material. This technique has been used by several religions, including christianity. (Which I only point out in particular because of how much I’ve seen that particular group reject meditation lately.)

House Mind –

This is the method that I use most. In it, you have an internal visualized landscape with some form of house/manor/castle. The building represents your mind, along with everything in it. This method relies heavily on symbology, which takes time to learn and get used to “translating” to allow you to figure out what exactly you are seeing. The symbology here is NOT something that can be looked up in a book, it is made up of things your particular brain relates to other things.

So for instance: if you found a room with a globe on a desk, it probably doesn’t mean much that it is on a desk because globes are often on desks. The globe itself might mean something about travel, if you used to plot plane flights on them as a child with your parents, because you associate globes with travel. But then, maybe you mostly remember globes from a boring history class and it’s meaning has something to do with that. Maybe an ornately folded napkin would remind you of travel, from a restaurant that did that when you were traveling. Every meaning depends on your personal experiences and what you thought was important, and most of the really big associations happen when you are young (under 18, at least).

This method can be very versatile and very powerful, because it allows for such direct communication with the subconscious. You can change something in the house representing your mind, and (if you keep reinforcing it at least) it will tell your mind that you want that part of your mind (or even body) to change in a particular way.

Perhaps I find a room filled with workout weights and equipment, but everything is damaged, dark, and covered in spider webs. My mind associates workout equipment with working out and getting in shape, but the state of decay in the room would suggest that my mind had forgotten about it or no longer thought it was important. I could change that by mentally going around the room, cleaning everything and getting it working again. By changing the room like that, I am asking my subconscious to give a higher priority to working out, and saying that I think it is a good and important thing. By giving my subconscious that message, it will be more likely to remind me to work out, and to make me enjoy it more than I would have otherwise.

Exploratory –

This method is more for understanding rather than changing yourself. Meditation is generally an active thing, where you are constantly directing your mind and keeping focused on task (It’s really easy to fall asleep by accident if you lose focus). This form of meditation is still active, however it allows your subconscious to direct you more. I’ve also found that this method can spill over into lucid dreaming fairly easily if you do not keep yourself focused, or if you are too tired when attempting it.

Focus / Subconscious Focus –

The principle here is to get your subconscious to take the form of your choosing as another entity in your mindscape that you can talk to and interact with. In theory, this allows for a very direct method of communication between your conscious and subconscious. This is supposed to be a very difficult technique, and one that takes a lot of practice and focus. I personally haven’t found it to be terribly hard to do, but I’ve been at this for a while and my brain seems to be more connected and self-aware than most. I would like to note that I haven’t found this method to be particularly relaxing, or terribly helpful/informative. For the most part, my subconscious seems to like teasing my conscious when I do this. The subconscious has access to a lot more information than the conscious, and in some ways is quite a bit smarter, however it doesn’t get to “talk” very often, and mine at least likes showing off and playing games. haha

This method is fairly different from the others, and I include it mostly out of my own curiosity about it, and as a demonstration of how diverse meditation can be.

In Summary

Meditation is good for everyone. It opens the lines of communication between different parts of the brain, allows you to find and begin to deal with whatever things are problems in your life, and helps to make you a happier person, more compassionate person. Meditation has been used for centuries by all different cultures and religions, and is something that I believe is fundamental and critical for our mental and physical health. It is easy to start and to learn, and can take as little or as much time as you want it to.

The subconscious isn’t very well understood yet, but it is a huge part of your mind, and it deserves your attention, even if you never get get into the more tricky aspects of meditation.

Thanks for reading 🙂

 

Musings

Absorbed in thought
An instance or period of reflection
ORIGIN
Middle English : from Old French muser ‘meditate, waste time,’ perhaps from medieval Latin musum ‘muzzle.’
~Apple Dictionary

This blogs’ purpose is to record my mind’s wanderings and musings as I try to understand a little more of the world. It should end up ranging from my own theories about brain function, to religions, to economics, to calculous, physics, chemistry, engineering, design, sewing and metal working.
I will offend people.

I go into this blog knowing that I’m going to talk about controversial subjects, because honestly, there aren’t many other places where I can freely share my theories and ideas without worrying about what my friends might think of me for them. My goal is to provoke people to really think about the world in a way that they haven’t before. So please, please do argue and talk with each other about what I post, I would truly love to see people so engaged in the topics I might present to you all. 🙂

I hope you all get something from this blog, and that you enjoy what you read.